"Sign or Else" vs "voluntarily and freely" -- but it cannot be both
I was talking with a classmate the other week when we were
on a short break.
Having been in class
with me since 2013, she is well aware of my passion for adoptee rights.
She shared with me that a close
relative is adopting a child.
Adopting a child from foster care.
She was saying that her relatives wanted an open adoption;
however someone (from either the agency or a caseworker in child welfare)
STRONGLY discouraged them from doing it.
Their reasoning? Her relatives
were told that if they do an open adoption, the mother can come back later at any time and
take the child away from them. So they decided to
do a closed adoption.
As we were talking, I told her that this information is
COMPLETELY FALSE! (Please, if anyone
knows differently, start a discussion here.) I told her that once the original parents
sign the relinquishment papers they have thirty days (in Pennsylvania) to change their mind. After that thirty days, it is over, they
legally cannot get the child back. I
expressed outrage that this person giving them advice was bullying and frightening them into a
decision for a closed adoption, when the family really wanted to provide an
open adoption.
Later in our conversation, this classmate also mentioned that the original mother has a newborn.
She was told to either “voluntarily” sign the relinquishment papers for
the older child,
or they would take the newborn from her.
“Wow, there was no coercion involved , was there?
That was a totally a voluntary choice she
made, wasn’t it?”
[I don’t think my
classmate really thought about it
until I mentioned coercion.
Hopefully it sunk in.]
Yes, this occurred in 2016 – not 1966, or 1986.
COERCION absolutely is alive and still at
work.
"Sign or Else"
verses
voluntarily
and
freely
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